MAY 21, 2010
There Must be an Election Coming Soon

To the Editor:

The dorsal fins of predatory political sharks have been spotted in Glen Lake. Some bloodstains have been seen in the water near the beach on the Back Road. This political shark swarming must mean that an election is coming soon in Goffstown…and not soon enough for some people.

The waters are warming and there is sure to be a “feeding frenzy” as passions intensify. What is an ordinary citizen to do? “Stay out of the water” seems to be an immediately prudent response.

However, the political sharks make many decisions that end up costing taxpayers a lot of money so it is necessary to “swim with the political sharks.”

Maybe carrying a “shark stick” would make a lot of sense when swimming in Glen Lake.

The predatory sharks seem to come in two species: Republifins and Demafins. Essentially they look and behave the same, so it is very difficult to tell them apart…they both attack and spend.

They are both descended from the same prehistoric species: RINOS (republicans in name only) and DINOS (democrats in name only).

Data from the Goffstown Town Hall suggests that there were about 4,400 registered Republifins and 3,419 Demafins in town in 2008.

It is very strange that in Goffstown there is also a third specie of finned political shark named Independefins – a benign species.

In 2008, there were 5,031 Independefins in Goffstown – the largest political group.

Anecdotal evidence from town suggests that many Republifins and Demofins are still morphing into Independefins (a benign species) because the two species specialize in attacking each other.

Identifying the two predatory species in the cloudy political waters of a stirred up Glen Lake is especially difficult.

The shark specie claiming to be conservative and found on the Right side of Glen Lake "transformed the Right from a movement that, at least roughly, believed first of all in individual liberty (and its corollaries: civil liberties domestically, and peace and ‘isolation’ in foreign affairs) into a movement that, in fact glorifies total war and the suppression of civil liberty." (Confidential Memo to the Volker Fund, "What Is to Be Done?" July 1961) – Murray Rothbard

The shark species found on the Left side of Glen Lake and claiming to be liberal, for all practical purposes, appears to have adapted all the characteristics of the other political species.

Both species are quite adept at “attack and spend.” What is a financially strapped taxpayer to do?

Maybe find a way to selectively breed Inpendefins would be one possibility.

In the meantime, fall and winter will come to Glen Lake and all the finny denizens will become sluggish, sink to the bottom and become dormant for a while, giving us some temporary relief.

Fear not, they are resilient species and they will return. Some things seem difficult to change.

I just thought that you had a “Right to Know (R2K).”

Ivan Beliveau


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